Rising from the Ashes

Homecoming, Homeleaving... Homewrecking.

2010-01-15T23:14:00.003-06:00

In the distance a trumpet blares a heralding blast of sound. I cannot see and it takes me minutes to realize I am surrounded by night... another dream? What is happening... the sound of thunder, it is not my heart... It is calvary. The night vanishes in flame, the smell of burnt horse-flesh, and the sound of dieing men.

I can't! Not again... I've found nothing about Kha and none who know it will teach me! The dreams have not been as fierce, though I cannot fathom why... I am in the epicenter again... in Seahaven. This is where it started... will this be where it ends? In Kizuni Odawi for so long I'd almost forgotten about The Fire. For a while once I returned I managed to convince myself it was only my imagination.

It isn't.

Those who I grew close to when I first came here are vanished. Trygon no doubt taken back to the sea since the Port reopened, Lord Garrach who knows where... I have heard word that Kuzma still watches the forest as a Ranger and perhaps he can help me adapt as I must. I am beginning to remember.

The troubles I faced while we confronted my jilted sisters traitorous suitor seem trivial now. Our families collided and, though they made sure we knew our place and knew what a sacrifice they made for us, our Sayaki relatives stood by our side. Likely more to save face for their own name than ours... Though, I should not be so rude to those who host the only family I have left... to those who are among the only family I have left.

And now I cannot see.

It is not that I am blind... it is not that my eyes are poor... there are simply those who my gaze avoids without my consent. What is different about them? The only thing is... I cannot sense them... the power, the ability, the new sense that developed just before I left. While I was gone I barely sensed a single soul... since I returned I sense them so much more powerfully... so much more easilly... and yet, this one... I could not see him.

I am being reborn yet again.

Happenings...

2009-06-09T23:32:00.002-05:00

The journey back to Kizuni Odawi was tougher than the journey here. Either there were more demons... or there were more demons following me. Maybe they are just smarter than they used to be a few months gone? It seems like those I evaded easily before had an uncanny knack for finding me this time. And the Fire... it urges me to destroy them without heed to how I could do so. It was difficult, but I avoided the Fire the whole way there.

Ah, I forgot to say - I couldn't find anyone to deliver my letter. It seemed silly to hand it to Mother when I reached Kizuni Odawi... but, I am glad I did. The pride in her eyes when she read the it warmed my heart more than anything else has in my whole life! It was nice to spend some time with my family, but the slanted eyes of the Sayaki watched me dissaprovingly from the moment I set foot within their citidel.

On the way back... it was strange - I did not notice, but as I neared Kizuni Odawi The Dreams seemd to become more infrequent. On my way back to Seahaven they grew stronger once more... and the fitful sleep seemed oddly interupted just in time, on far more than one occasion, to avoid being devoured by a stalking demon. It was almost as if the Fire is watching out for me now...

I can almost feel it... the Phoenix... it lays in the back of my mind... whenever I think on it, then it flees... but, it is there... I sense its presence now... though I cannot describe it, there is power and knowledge there.

The Dreams Return

2009-05-15T03:48:00.003-05:00

I am nothing but what I am. I am a blank slate with words writ upon it in fire. I cannot read them, I have never known what they say. I have never seen them before. They are not there. There is something I cannot remember, but that is because I never knew it.

And yet, the memory remains.

The dreams have begun again. I woke uncertain of where I was, even for a brief instant who I was. Is this the fire? Will it forge me? Will I be reduced to ashes as I have in so many dreams? I have nothing but questions... my new life gives me nothing and takes so much. What shape will the Fire cast me in?

...What am I?

The First Letter Home

2009-05-15T03:01:00.004-05:00

Dearest Mother,

I've included ten shillings to help you and Allia and Mira, I hope it reaches you safely. I have great news! I have been accepted as a Paige to one of the Royal Guard! The people here... They are similar to those in Kizuni Odawi, always searching for a way to make their own profit... but, they are much more willing to accept losses in order to offer help if they can. Already so many have tried to help me; but Lord Garrach is the best! They say one day I might join the Guard too! And, then I'll get our home back so you and the girls don't have to worry anymore.

How are you and the girls? Is Allia still being courted by the vinter's boy? And, Mira... has she finally settled down? I know how much trouble she gets into, and I'm sure you know more than you ever let us see. How are Nuncle and Auntie? I hope they are going easier on you now that I am gone. I know they have to do as they do... but, I am glad to be away from it even as grateful as I am that they helped us.

Do not tell them yet, but I hope to have enough to start paying them back soon. They deserve more than just gratitude and if I become a Royal Guard... if I help reclaim the Highlands.. they will get what they deserve.

You and the Girls have All my Love,

Your Son

These thoughts, these treacherous thoughts...

2009-05-13T01:03:00.002-05:00

It was not my own. I know my mind, I know it better than anything... even my own mother. Every crevasse, every notion, every thought... and that was not mine.

And you've been having strange dreams, is it?

It fed off my thoughts, worry about the dreams... the power... the Fire! So, now I must ask myself - what was it? Is there another within me whispering words into my mind? Or perhaps something else? I assumed it was the man I was talking to... maybe it was... maybe one day I will be able to do that with the Fire.

Until I know... I will follow the Fire.

A new sense...

2009-05-08T23:28:00.003-05:00

And, now a new feeling... a sense... I feel like I can sense... something... in those around me. I feel like if I looked just a little closer... looked? No, that isn't right... if I felt more keenly... there would be something around them.

Is it just the City that is changing me? I grow more devious by the second - Trygon is using me, and likely others will as well once they learn of my ability... whatever this ability is. And, I will allow it... so long as it brings me closer to my goal. I want nothing more in this world or the next than to save the Highlands.

So, what else can I do? This is my time of learning... I must learn all that I can. I must learn to fight, to 'weave' Kha, and learn to lie and be fierce as Trygon says. All this and more, I'm sure. Much, much more...

How many times must the Phoenix die before it lives forever?

The Flood

2009-05-08T15:56:00.002-05:00

It is everywhere, now. I cannot sleep because what was once in my dreams is all around me. I felt it as a gentle trickle far away yesterday... I had to search for hours before I found it... but, now the Fire is all around me. I cannot breath except it fills my lungs, cannot see for it clouds my vision, the crackling fills my ears and the smell of ash clogs my nostrils. And they restrain me!

I no longer know what to do. It seems so obvious that I should delve into the sky, the earth... I should gather lightning and fire in my fist. It seems so natural... this is what I was born to do. They say this is Kha... the power that shaped the world! Surely it could take back my homeland - I would no longer be a vagabond and my mother and sisters could live in peace away from the prejudice of the Sayaki.

The Phoenix will Rise from the Ashes!

Dreamless Sleep...

2009-05-07T15:40:00.003-05:00

I could not sleep. I wandered all last night, evaded Demons in the forest, and felt the power of my dreams... Only this time... it was outside of me. What could this mean? I asked myself. What could this be? I followed the river past Millford and there it was. I pulled fire from the world and lightning from the sky.

After I found it, exhausted, I slept on the bank of the river with the rain falling upon me. The fire was still there when I woke... but, I managed to tear myself away from it. For the first time in weeks I didn't dream.

Epic Battle

2009-05-07T01:17:00.004-05:00

Blades clashed as the Legendary Pirate Lord and his young prodigy circled and fought. "You show great skill, I am hard pressed to meet you." Captain Avoura's words encouraged the boy and his renewed assault forced the Master of the Sky to the ground. "It is your training that brought me this far, Master. Now I must go to meet my fate."

Daydreams. My first battle was nothing but embarrassment. I fought like a blind turkey with its feet chopped off. It is clear that I have far to go - but, I have only been in Seahaven a day and already I have found teachers. Master Captain Trygon Avoura said he would teach me for free and Master Forge did not mention a bond-fee either... I hope that soon I will be able to begin sending money back to Ma and my sisters - a dowry would help the girls have a happy life... they deserve it.

I find myself aching for the comfort of sleep... the restful embrace of the fire.

Noble Asperation

2009-05-06T23:02:00.005-05:00

They must hand out nobility like candy in this City - I hardly take two steps before I am surprised by another of them. I had heard that Seahaven was less discriminating than Kizuni Odawi, but this is almost disgusting - they are actually mingling with us commoners, do they not know we are not worthy of their time? Still, Lord Garrach is impressive - he certainly deserves his title. His armor and axe are wonderful! One day I will be a Knight just like him!

There were dragons in my dreams today. Their fire washed over me, filled me with power and courage, and then destroyed me. I lay as a pile of ash, the symbol of my destruction, and the feeling of anhialation was not unpleasant. I felt myself reform, my life beginning again, but still the fire burned within me.

The dreams are growing more frequent... more urgent. The Crimson Sky, the Watch, The Royal Guard, whomever will teach me... I must learn how I may take back my homeland. I never had the dreams until I left and I know that means I must return.

Perchance to dream...

2009-05-06T07:57:00.006-05:00

I have arrived in Seahaven. It has its own subtle majesty that I had not imagined. Kizuni Odawi was breathtaking and I thought I had gotten over the gawkiness of a country-lad, but Seahaven has its own wonder. The people here are always hurrying around as if the day would be wasted with a second's rest.

I am having the dream again.

I cannot hide from the fire in the dreams, it is within me. Everything I look at burns and if I close my eyes I see the world burning. I do not know what it means, I have been having it all my life. Every time I can feel the power even as the flame consumes me.

I do not know whether to be fearful or eager for sleep.

All stories have a beginning...

2009-05-05T05:13:00.007-05:00

I was only five when Nightfall descended upon Heas but I still remember the cries of terror as they tore through my home. Darkness and blood. I lost my Father that day… my brother… as we fled to the Northern Hold others fell and even their memory is lost to me. I do remember the tears that lasted past even Daybreak - some of the refugees never moved on, some of them never moved again. North Hold was a cesspool of death.

When the Marquis de Aruta perished the tenuous hold on the Highlands was lost. So many could not even find the will to run when the Demons came over the walls - the dim memory of Nightfall rushed back to me, but this time I saw what I only heard then. I don’t remember running, or even stopping. Since Daybreak the Demons were more scarce and that is all that saved us in our mad dash to safety.

Along with my Mother and sisters we found refuge with distant relatives in the newly constructed Kizuni Odawi. Since then my fortunes have improved, but you have to look back four generations to see my Sayaki heritage… and the Sayaki do not care to look that far. They have taught me much that was neglected during the chaos which reigned over my childhood, but I can do no more here.

Mother can hardly support the girls, but at least they have a chance if I leave now. They can find husbands if I am not around to remind the Sayaki where they came from. And, I have much to learn. I must travel to Seahaven. I will walk out of the ashes and into the fire.